Friday, August 28, 2009

Hello sweet girl,
Mommy misses you so much! It has been a hard two days because Daddy went back to work, so now I have to miss him, too. I hope you will help keep Daddy safe while he is at work. Did you wave goodbye to Daddy when he left, did you blow him kisses, did you pretty girl?! I imagined that you did.. he would have kissed you goodbye and I would have lifted your sweet little arm and waved and made you say in a squeakly little girl voice, "bye bye Daddy, I love you, be safe!" And I bet Daddy would have had to come back and get one more kiss after that, yes he would have! Because you are Daddy's pretty girl! And I know every night when he came home, he would have come straight to you for a kiss! I would have been a little jealous of you, isn't Mommy silly! Mommy can't compete with such a beautiful baby girl for Daddy's heart! Daddy's little girl, that's what you are, and will always always be. Mommy's girl too! That's right, Mommy's girl forever. I miss you Kathlyn. Gram was giving me hugs today while I was sad and she tells me that God is with you, and He's telling you how much Mommy loves you. Remember, Mommy doesn't understand about where you are, so I will always ask questions to you my baby. Is Gram right, is God telling you how much I love you? I hope He is. I am sending you so much love, but I want God to tell you too. I love you! I love my angel Kathlyn, my very own beautiful angel! Kisses and tickles for the beautiful baby. Can you send me some smiles? I wanna see your smiles Katie. I never got to see you smile, you were just too little when I met you to smile yet. I wonder again and again, are you 4 weeks old now, or are you a newborn forever? I wonder if you were here, what would you be doing now? Would you have smiled yet? Would you only want Mommy to nurse you, or would you be letting Daddy and Gram feed you with a bottle? You'd be so cute peeking out at Daddy from behind a bottle, so so cute my girl! I want to see those beautiful blue eyes looking at Daddy's blue eyes too. Such a pretty baby girl with beautiful blue eyes, that's Mommy's girl. I wonder if time would be going much faster than it is. Time is going slow for Mommy. But I bet it would be going faster if you were here. That's what other mommies say.. that time goes very fast when the children they love so much are growing up. So maybe by now, you would already be a year old! I imagine you getting all messy with your birthday cakes, isn't that silly?! What a cute little girl you'd be with your big pink birthday girl cake. Everyone would be taking your picture a hundred times and Mommy would have to show off ALL the pictures, because they would ALL be cute and I couldn't pick a favorite. I imagine you with cute hairbows and cute little girl shoes. I imagine you getting on the bus as a cute little school girl with a brand new first day of school dress every year. And I imagine you being a kind, beautiful, funny, smart, selfless woman one day. I would have taught you to be all those things, and I would have told you about Jesus, and to love God and to love people. All these things Mommy will never get to do with you, my sweet Kathlyn. All these things I won't get to do, but only to love you as much as I can with all my heart, ALL Mommy's heart! I don't have to teach you those things, because now you already know everything about the world. Mommy still knows that you are safe and happy where you are, even though I miss you so much, I am glad you are safe. Give Granddaddy a kiss from me and from Gram. Thank you for being my beautiful baby.. Mommy's beautiful girl forever! You are still my baby!
Love you always and forever,
Mommy

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