Thursday, June 30, 2011

23 months

Dearest Kathlyn,
Hi babygirl! Mommy is so sorry she didn't write to you at 22 months. You know it doesn't mean I don't love you, or that I forgot the 30th that month. You know I think of you every day and every minute, I just didn't get a chance to write that day. Mommy will always, always love you, and always, always grieve for you, Mommy has just found different ways of grieving and honoring you besides writing. It's kinda similar anyway to when babies are alive and being raised... Mommies usually say how many months old they are, but once they get near 2 years, some mommies don't count it in months anymore. So really that just means to Mommy, that I don't grieve you any more on the 30th of the month than I do every other day of the month. So I probably won't be writing specifically to you on the 30th anymore. But I will still write to you sometimes. Keep listening for Mommy's songs and thoughts and prayers for you every day though! Mommy loves you so much, and Daddy too. We wish you were here with us enjoying our summer. And it is so very hard to plan your birthday celebration without you. Would you want pink princesses? Or puppies? Or Sesame Street? Hello Kitty? Or maybe owls and birdies? I wish I knew what all your likes and favorites were, so I could plan your party around it. I wish I got to know you more than as just a newborn baby. Are you a newborn baby still, forever and ever, or are you 23 months old now? To me, you'll always be my perfect little newborn, though I imagine and long for the 2 year old you, too. You are still my baby! Kisses to the sky forever my love.. sleep tight and wait for me.


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